Monday, 22 August 2011

War is Over

Initially I thought Dave 'The PM' Cameron had cut another holiday short to sort out the problem with the growing crisis with weekly bin collections but no he wanted to come back from his 5th holiday to take the glory for sorting out Libya. He seemed to come back a bit quicker than last time when he limped back to tell the Feds to sort out rioters.

This lack of focus on the big issue of bin weekly bin collection is worrying and would have my Uncle Eric turning in his grave; assuming he was dead and assuming he is able to turn over unaided.

It appears that Uncle Eric’s war against the decimation of every Englishman’s right to have the remains of his chicken tikka collected weekly is failing – perhaps he should have a word with William Hague for some military strategic advice. Mr Hague may also be able to offer advice on how to handle a young feisty SpAd that can get you in all sorts of trouble.
So we now a have the situation where conservative run Rossendale District Council in Cumbria are no longer even bothering to come up your road to collect the household rubbish. Residents are expected to just dump it at the end of the lane. I think next the council should just get residents to chuck it in one of their many lakes that litter the landscape, that will be cheap and save a load of bother.

Also Dave Cameron’s own constituency council, West Oxfordshire, has moved away from weekly collection. Good Lord can imagine how poor Sam Cam is coping with a slop bucket in her pantry? According to the The Telegraph over half of the households in England do not have their rubbish collected weekly. Since Uncle Eric started to bang on incessantly about weekly bin collection a further 19 councils have moved away from them. Come on Uncle Eric get a grip, you are losing the war!!!!!

Here is my latest FoI request.

Dear Chums

This is a public service announcement. The war is over and you, DCLG, have lost. I repeat the war is over. Please put down your pens and raise your hands above your heads.

Uncle Eric has waged war on many fronts over the last few months but his attack on councils moving way from weekly bin collection has been the highest profile. It does seem now that with over half of households in England not receiving a weekly collection the war has been well and truly lost. More and more council scuttle away from the costly weekly collection faster than a rat heading for Uncle Eric's discarded daily chicken tikka scraps.

I wonder if Uncle Eric has any plans to make a dignified surrender or possibly commit hari-kari in the foyer of Eland House, dressed only in his rubber knickers like a defeated Sumo warrior?

Under the FoI act, may I request the following?

1.      Any plans to introduce the release of additional grants (delivered through specific grant) to enable hard pressed local authorities to reintroduce weekly collection?
2.      Any communication between DCLG and West Oxfordshire District Council relating wholly or partly to waste collection since April 2011.

Yours never surrendering

PS It is good to be back!

Thursday, 4 August 2011

Civil disobedience

I had not realised that my blog had global appeal until I looked at the web stats and saw I was getting hits from all over the globe – from Chile to Uzbekistan to Nigeria to Philippines. Obviously the largest numbers of hits originate from the UK but there does seem to be a growing number from the US with India not far behind. This blog entry is dedicated to my many Indian fans especially as we all know my Uncle Eric is a big big fan of your wonderful food.

As we all know Uncle Eric is a fan of curry and it came as no surprise the distance he would travel to have a good one (as long as he was not walking or riding a bike in his rubber knickers). In April, Uncle Eric took a  4-day jolly with colleagues to India, at tax payers’ expense.  The purpose?  - “Ongoing focus on building community relations and trade and business links” - not sure how this helps struggling local authorities or Uncle Eric’s diet but I hope they had fun.

Here is my latest request (It would be nice if someone else wants to ask these questions as I suspect I am still declared as vexatious.)

Nameste Chums

Uncle Eric took a 4 day jolly to India in April. He no doubt arrived like new Viceroy from the bygone era of the British Raj – ready to tell the natives how to run things but spending most of the time looking pasty , sweating and generally causing offence.

From a distance one could have been forgiven to seeing a close resemblance to a previous great Indian thinker and politician. The bald head; the wire-framed glasses; the gentle manner; the quiet voice. Alas any comparison with Mahatma Gandhi disappears on closer inspection – it is as if Gandhi had forgone the diet, non violent tolerance and socialist views. Indeed when Gandhi was to reply to the question of what he thought about  Western Civilisation with the remark he “thought it was a good idea” - could well be directed at the state of local government after Uncle Eric has massacred it. I suspect that also Uncle Eric is unlikely to turn the other cheek – even though he possesses two of size of a bungalow.

Previous Freedom of Information request have stated that the trip occurred zero expenditure. I know Indian is cheap but cannot believe that the proud Uncle Eric slept on the streets of Old Delhi holding out a begging bowl. Hence someone most have paid for this trip. Can you therefore supply the following information?

1)     A complete agenda of the trip to India. Include time of meetings, meals, excursions and places of stay. Please include which Indian organisation or body also attended and paid for trip. As India has its own FOI act I wish to follow up details of the trip with Indian authorities.

2)     What plans does the Secretary of State have to host a similar trip for visitors from the Indian Government

Yours in civil disobedience