Tuesday, 6 December 2011

Walking in a Pickles wonderland


Earlier today I had the joy of attending one of the twins school Winterval performance.  I knew my  little Eric had written his own song and had been practicing hard for the last couple of weeks but I had no idea what he was going to do.  So when he appeared on stage in the school hall and sang like an angel it brought tears to many eyes. I was the proudest Dad in the hall and now I cannot wait to see what his twin sister Erica does next week.

I would loved to have recorded the performance and share it here but due to an exclusive deal with SyCo Music  I am unable to. Simon Cowell has kindly allowed me to share the lyrics though.  Could this be this year’s surprise Christmas Number One?

Why not click on the YouTube link at the bottom of this post, gather around the PC, turn up the volume and have a good old office since along..

Walking in a Pickles wonderland

Councils are you listening?
Your assets are glistening.
What a beautiful sight,
And a value that's right
For walking in a Pickles wonderland.

Time to sell, it's the hour
Since we reduced your 'Revenue Spending Power'.
You've held them too long,
They're going for a song.
Walking in a Pickles wonderland

Did you know that Hampshire owns some farmland?
The council owns the home of Swindon Town!
Selling off the golf courses across Leeds,
Should help to keep the council tax right down.

What you sell is your decision,
That's the joy of Localism.
Walking along,
Singing a song.
Walking in a Pickles wonderland

Have you met this friend of mine from Serco?
He could do a quote for you right now.
Outsourcing services is the future.
And he is the man to show you how.

Cut the power and the heating.
Earmarked reserves are depleting.
Reduce straight-away
Executive pay.
Walking in a Pickles wonderland.


  1. Derek this is an FOI classic!

    You deserve a medal my man (or at least a gold disc).

    Merry winterval from your Armchair Audit Army

  2. Just why are you so obesessed, I wonder.

  3. Nick, do be quiet! We're all obsessed with Uncle Eric for the same reason as you -because he's so great! Really great! Well done Derek, a Christmas treat keep flying the flag for the arm chair auditors. Even Uncle Eric says flags are cool!

  4. A heartbreaking work of staggering genius.

  5. Thank you chums. My little Eric is so thankful for the kind comments.

    And NSW - why not for once say something nice, go on it won't hurt you.

  6. "Something nice". Happy now? And rest assured we are closing in. It could be a really bright start to 2012 - clearing out the rubbish in January. You'd be amazed how much we have lined up for you and the other "photocopier fillers". Enjoy the rest of the Christmas holiday - and a bright and sparkly new year to all.